Been a week. I have been hanging on to the sliver side of sanity. I have seen my two exposed fingers swell and change to subtle shades of blue and purple. I want to see what shade the hand is. I wish I could. My two fingers up to 4 inches from my elbow are wrapped. It is my right hand. Has been miserable, agonizing, and frustrating. To type, to text has been hard. Not just the mechanics, but the thinking, the clarity of the mind. It is as if the flow valve has been shut off. Like my left hand can not communicate with my brain in thought process.
I first noticed this when I decided to continue with my purging/organizing. Cleared out a bookshelf but then could not manage the purging. Five days later those books still sit on the floor. It is a visual display of my adjusting I am having to make. To type this, would not have happened two days ago. But I have figured it out. I just had to include the one finger of the right hand. I wrote out a check the other day, that was interesting. Looked like a 5 year old wrote it.
What I would rather do is just stay in my PJ's and sleep. I have. But not ideal. So I have to do what we all do when challenges come our way, adapt and adjust. I have been making dinner. Dishes. Laundry. Grocery Shopping. Shuttling kids around. Showering. Yes, that is an accomplishment! Try shampooing with one hand. I have even decided that if my Christmas stays up until February that is okay. Those are little mental games I play to keep from going nuts! That and the hope, the knowledge I have that this will heal and it is temporary. Thank goodness.
One week down, 5 more to go...
